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Singer Demi Lovato has been outspoken about her eating disorder in the past. On Christmas Eve 2020, the “I Love Me” singer revealed why she’s more comfortable in her body than ever before and why she’s celebrating her recovery this holiday season.

Demi Lovato dealt with an eating disorder

Lovato rose to prominence during her years on the Disney Channel in the ’00s. She starred in the Camp Rock movies and the sitcom Sonny with a Chance. However, Lovato entered rehab in 2010, later explaining that she was dealing with addiction, bipolar disorder, and bulimia.

In her 2017 YouTube documentary, Simply Complicated, Lovato called food “still the biggest challenge in my life.” “When I was in a relationship with [ex-boyfriend, actor] Wilmer [Valderrama], I went three years without purging, and when we broke up, that’s one of the first things I did,” she explained.

She later changed her management to better cope

In July 2018, Lovato made headlines when she was hospitalized following an overdose. She stayed out of the spotlight for months but began to plan a musical comeback in 2019 when she signed with manager Scooter Braun. She said that her relapse and changing her management had to do with her eating disorder.

“I lived a life for the past six years that I felt wasn’t my own,” she said on The Ellen DeGeneres Show in March 2020. “I struggled really hard with an eating disorder, but it turned into other things. My life, I just felt was so, and I hate to use this word, but I felt like it was controlled by so many people around me.”

A Christmas throwback prompted Lovato to discuss it again

Demi Lovato arrives at the 2020 E! People's Choice Awards in Santa Monica, California on Sunday, November 15, 2020.
Demi Lovato arrives at the 2020 E! People’s Choice Awards in Santa Monica, California on Sunday, November 15, 2020. | Rich Polk/E! Entertainment/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images

Like many celebrities, Lovato follows and even occasionally shares posts from her fans. On December 24, 2020, she shared one from a Lovatic fan account of herself from a previous Christmas. But Lovato’s memories of that particular holiday aren’t entirely positive.

“My face/eyes were so swollen from binging and purging so much that day/night… I’m so glad that’s behind me and I can finally breathe this Christmas,” she wrote. “If you struggle with an eating disorder and the holidays are hard for you just remember you are NOT ALONE AND YOU ARE WORTH RECOVERY.”

She discussed her recovery in Christmas Eve post

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Shortly after posting the Instagram Story, Lovato shared a series of photos of her body, complete with an important message. “I used to genuinely believe recovery from an eating disorder wasn’t real,” Lovato began, noting how she used to think “that everyone was faking or secretly relapsing behind closed doors.”

“I’m so grateful that I can honestly say for the first time in my life – my dietitian looked at me and said ‘This is what eating disorder recovery looks like,” she continued. “In honor of my gratitude for the place I’m in today, this was a lil shoot I did by myself in quarantine this summer when I wanted to celebrate my stretch marks instead of being ashamed of them.”

Lovato shared the photos (both retouched and untouched), saying, “Let this be a reminder to anyone who doesn’t think it’s possible: IT ACTUALLY IS. YOU CAN DO IT. I BELIEVE IN YOU. This year was tough.. be gentle on yourself if you slip up and remember to get right back on track because you’re WORTH THE MIRACLE OF RECOVERY. I LOVE YOU.”

How to get help: In the U.S. call the National Eating Disorders Association helpline at 1-800-931-2237.