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‘Friends’: 3 Times Monica Geller Clearly Didn’t Understand Boundaries

Every 'Friends' character had good and bad qualities. Some had more good than bad or vice versa. Monica Geller's biggest critics argue that the professional chef was difficult and rigid. They also note that she refused to respect the boundaries of her friends and her romantic partners.

Monica Geller is one of the most divisive Friends characters. Fans of the famed series are pretty split in their feelings about the neurotic professional chef. Some fans loved her work ethic, her strong personality, and her responsible nature. Others think those same qualities made her difficult, rigid, and occasionally downright mean. No matter their stance on Monica, many Friends fans agree that she had difficulty understanding boundaries. Do you remember these three times that Monica really crossed the line? 

Monica broke into Richard Burke’s voicemail and didn’t understand why it was wrong 

Monica’s most unreasonable moments seemed to revolve around her romantic relationships. These relationships are also the ones that suffered the most from boundary violations. Monica was, understandably, distraught when she and Richard Burke broke up in the season 2 finale of Friends. Several episodes later, though, she completely unravels when she uses his password to listen to his answering machine messages. 

Monica Geller runs into Richard Burke after their breakup in the video rental store
Monica Geller and Richard Burke | Chris Haston/NBCU Photo Bank

That would have been a violation in and of itself, but she makes matters worse by telling Richard’s daughter what she had done and freaking out when Michelle wasn’t comfortable with the admission. She didn’t stop there, either. She then calls back and records a new outgoing message by accident. While Richard Burke never mentioned the incident, Friends fans think it deserved another mention. 

Monica invited her friends to walk through Pete Becker’s apartment 

Monica wanted everyone to respect her space, including her roommates, but she didn’t respect other people’s personal space. When Monica started dating Pete Becker, a millionaire, she was understandably excited. Pete’s house was supposed to be pretty cool, and she told her friends all about it. 

Monica Geller and Pete Becker embrace in an industrial kitchen during season 3 of 'Friends'
Monica Geller and Pete Becker in ‘Friends’ | NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal via Getty Images

That wouldn’t have been a problem if Monica hadn’t decided to bring her entire crew with her when Pete asked her to housesit while he was away. Sure, he seemed mostly OK with it when he found out everyone was at his apartment, but he never gave Monica explicit consent to walk her friends through his home. Friends fans note it was absolutely a boundary issue. 

Monica Geller refused to let Rachel Green decorate the apartment 

Monica’s boundary issues weren’t confined to her romantic relationships. Because she was desperate for control, Monica overstepped her friends’ boundaries often. She could be downright unreasonable. She was especially harsh with Rachel Green.

Courteney Cox and Jennifer Aniston on the set of 'Friends'
Courteney Cox and Jennifer Aniston | David Hume Kennerly/Getty Images
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Monica refused to acknowledge that the apartment she shared with Rachel was equally Rachel’s for the entire time they lived together. Everything inside the apartment belonged to Monica, and she refused to let Rachel bring anything in. When Rachel finally stood up for herself and set a firm boundary, Monica trampled it by breaking the one, albeit ugly, home decor item Rachel managed to sneak in. To be fair, she was apparently equally difficult when Phoebe Buffay was living with her.