‘Gilmore Girls’: In Defense of Dean Forrester

Dean Forrester went from the perfect first boyfriend to a much-hated cheater in the span of five seasons. The Gilmore Girls character is mostly hated by fans now, and we can’t say we blame them. Dean experienced a character assassination in season 5 of the series before he walked off into the sunset after a fight with Luke Danes. Despite some of Dean Forrester’s final moments on Gilmore Girls being far from positive, we think the character gets a little too much hate. We have come to the defense of Dean. It feels like someone has to. 

Dean Forrester was really very sweet to Rory Gilmore initially 

When Gilmore Girls fans first met Dean Forrester, he seemed like the perfect guy. He was tall, handsome, and absolutely smitten with Rory. Once they finally got together, Dean was protective and attentive toward his girlfriend. 

Dean was a good influence. He was responsible and, while not academically minded, appeared to take school somewhat seriously. Dean had a few moments when he had difficulty controlling his temper, but overall, he seemed to harness his emotions well. Well, he did until Jess Mariano turned up on the scene. 

Dean’s jealous streak only appeared after Rory Gilmore started gaslighting him

Dean was a nice guy when fans first met him. He turned jealous, needy, and controlling later, but we aren’t sure he was 100% in the wrong. Yes, Dean needed to back off and give Rory some space, but he grew angry and jealous only after Rory started gaslighting him. 

Rory spent months insisting that she and Jess were just friends and trying to force Dean to interact with him on a friendly level, knowing her feelings were far from platonic. He felt Rory pulling away and wanted to figure out why it was happening. We don’t think that was strange. If Rory had just been honest with him, Dean probably would have handled the situation much better. Rory gaslit Dean, and he reacted. While his reactions weren’t great, we can’t say we blame him. 

Dean didn’t seem to have any real support, either 

We don’t think Dean was the right guy for Rory. He wasn’t exactly the bad guy in his relationship with her, either, though. Dean was treated pretty terribly, and he had almost no support. Not only did Dean get gaslit by Stars Hollow’s most beloved teen resident, but he had virtually no guidance or help when the relationship did finally end. After their first break up, which was totally understandable, the town’s adult residents treated him like a villain. Luke Danes got into a physical altercation with him over it.

No one offered Dean an ear when he and Rory broke up for the second time, either. He was forced to watch Rory and Jess get together the next day. Once they were an item, Dean was all but ignored by everyone around Stars Hollow. 

While Dean is largely to blame for cheating on his wife and their subsequent divorce, we can’t place 100% of the blame on him there, either. Again, he was a teen with literally no guidance. Dean’s parents seemed checked out and didn’t offer their son direction. They were never seen around town, and Dean was almost always tasked with caring for his younger sister. They didn’t seem to take issue with Dean marrying someone he had dated only a year fresh out of high school. When that marriage failed, they didn’t seem particularly interested in helping him manage his mistake. His father literally hid in the basement instead of helping his son face his problems. 

While Dean Forrester certainly had some issues, we can see how he went from a respectful teen to an angsty young adult. We like to think that in adulthood, Dean has figured it all out and is a standup guy.