John Lennon’s Ex-Wife Said His Aunt ‘Battered Away’ His Self Confidence 

John Lennon was raised by his aunt, and the pair had a complicated relationship. According to Lennon’s first wife, Cynthia, his Aunt Mimi demanded his affection but was very hard on him. Cynthia believed this treatment was detrimental to Lennon’s self-confidence. She said this might have contributed to Lennon’s drive, but she found it difficult to forgive his aunt for her behavior.

John Lennon was raised by his aunt

Lennon was born to Julia and Alfred Lennon in 1940. Alfred was a merchant seaman who was often away from his family, but he disappeared for a particularly lengthy period in 1944. By the time he came home, Julia was pregnant with another man’s child and didn’t want Alfred in her life anymore. When Lennon was six, Alfred dropped out of his life entirely for the next two decades. 

Julia’s sister, Mimi Smith, complained about her to Social Services twice, and Julia ultimately gave Mimi custody of Lennon. He was primarily raised by Smith and her husband, George.

John Lennon’s ex-wife said his aunt beat down his self-confidence

Smith and Lennon had a complicated relationship, particularly as he got older. Cynthia recalled Smith flying into a rage because Lennon gifted her with a coat. Cynthia believed that her outburst happened, at least in part, because Smith was jealous.

“Mimi wanted and expected John’s devotion, and if you got in her way you were not popular,” Cynthia wrote in her book John. “She constantly hounded and oppressed him. He constantly complained that she never left him alone and found fault with everything he did. Even before his mother died she had been the closest thing he had to a parent, and he wanted to please her, but she made it impossible for him. Years later, when he was world-famous and wealthy, he was still trying to earn her approval and she was still telling him off.”

Cynthia said that this took a significant toll on Lennon’s self-confidence.

“Most descriptions of Mimi that have appeared in print were based on interviews with her — she outlived John by 11 years,” Cynthia wrote. “She loved to fuel the image of the stern but loving aunt who provided the secure backdrop to John’s success. But that wasn’t the Mimi I knew. She battered away at John’s self-confidence and left him angry and hurt.”

Cynthia Lennon said it was hard for her to forgive his aunt

After witnessing many interactions between Lennon and Smith, Cynthia couldn’t help but feel resentful toward his aunt.

“No doubt the impossibility of pleasing her was at least part of John’s drive towards success,” she wrote. “But, as his girlfriend, I found it hard to forgive her carping, when a little kindness or encouragement would have meant so much to him. Perhaps that was why the unconditional love and support I gave him meant so much.”

Still, Cynthia attended her funeral, which took place long after she and Lennon had divorced.

“When she died I went to the funeral, with John’s sisters and cousins,” she wrote. “Mimi had been the eldest of the five Stanley sisters but was the last to die, having reached the ripe old age of eighty-nine. Her nurse told Julia that Mimi’s last words had been, ‘I’m afraid of dying. I’ve been a wicked woman.’ When I heard this it sent a chill through me. I felt sorry for Mimi, who had obviously suffered, but her self-assessment had been true.”