Priscilla Presley Said Elvis Was Unable to Do What It Took to Save Their Marriage

For a long time, Priscilla Presley felt that her marriage to Elvis Presley was on shaky ground. He was rarely home, and she began to feel that they lived entirely separate lives. While she loved Elvis and wished their marriage could work, she knew that Elvis wasn’t willing to do what was necessary to keep their relationship alive.

Priscilla Presley said Elvis wouldn’t take action to save their marriage

In the final days of Priscilla and Elvis’ marriage, she felt that they had grown apart as people. He was away so often that she had developed hobbies and friendships entirely separate from her marriage, which she had never done before. He didn’t seem to even be aware of their changing relationship, though. Even if he had been, Priscilla wasn’t sure if he would have been willing to change in meaningful enough ways.

“In order for our marriage to survive, Elvis would have had to take down all the artificial barriers restricting our life as a couple,” she wrote in her book Elvis and Me. “There was too much room for doubt, too many unanswered questions for the mind to play upon.”

Priscilla was too hesitant to directly ask him to be more vulnerable in their relationship, though. As a result, nothing changed.

“It was difficult for him to come to terms with his role as a father and husband,” she wrote. “And since neither of us had the ability to sit down and squarely face the issues jeopardizing the family, there seemed to be no hope. What really hurt was that he was not sensitive to me as a woman and his attempt at reconciliation had come too late; I had taken possession of my own life.”

Priscilla Presley noticed Elvis’ inability to be vulnerable even before their marriage

Elvis’ unwillingness to be vulnerable with her had been a problem for Priscilla even before their marriage. He was struggling with a string of career letdowns but refused to speak to her about it in a meaningful way.

“I didn’t understand his difficulty in revealing his weaknesses to me,” she wrote. “Only later did I realize how important it was to Elvis to always appear in control in front of me.”

She could hear him talking about his problems with his father and she agonized over her inability to help him.

“When things were bad, Elvis called Vernon and they talked for hours about their problems,” she wrote. “He told his daddy he was lonely and depressed and no one understood him. When I overheard these words, I continued to take it personally, again thinking that I was failing him.”

He eventually felt he had made a mistake

In the years after their divorce, Elvis grew to regret his behavior. While he was not able to change while he was still married to Priscilla, he wished he had been able to save his marriage. 

“I know I’ve done some stupid things,” he told Priscilla, “but the stupidest was not realizing what I had until I lost it. I want my family back.”

Elvis and Priscilla never got back together, but they remained close for the rest of his life.