Selena Gomez Shares Exactly What Happened Before Her Much-Criticized Performance of ‘Lose You to Love Me’ at the 2019 AMAs
Selena Gomez has been a major force in music for years. She’s released some of the most acclaimed songs of the last couple of decades. That said, not everything she’s done has been an example of her best work. For her new documentary, Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me, and the self-reflection she did with it, the Only Murder in the Building actor decided to address one of the biggest musical flops of her career.
Selena Gomez knew the song would be a hit from the start
“Lose You to Love Me” was destined for greatness as soon as Selena Gomez had the idea for it. The writing process only took her and her co-writers around 45 minutes to complete, and the reason for that was clear. “It’s about more than just a lost love, it’s about me learning to choose myself, to choose life,” she said while recounting the story in her documentary, according to Glamour. As both a way to accept the end of her relationship with her ex Justin Bieber and as a life-affirming anthem on its own, it was pretty much perfect.
The song did and still does mean a lot to Gomez, much of this coming from her reasons for writing the song. As stated, it related to her breakup with Bieber, a process that was extremely public and publicized at the time. “I feel like I had to go through the worst possible heartbreak ever, and then just forgetting everything at the drop of a hat, it was really confusing.” The song was a way to process all of that, coming out the other side a better and stronger person. “But I just think that needed to happen. And ultimately it was the best thing that ever happened to me.”
Gomez had a lot of problems while rehearsing for the live performance
Selena Gomez was always confident in the song, but its monumental success upon release was entirely different. As her first No. 1 on the charts, it catapulted her to a new level of fame, bolstered by the second song she released right after being another major success in its own right. It even brought Gomez’s longtime friend and fellow star Taylor Swift to tears when she first heard it. With a hit song tearing it up like this, it was only natural that she’d be offered the chance to perform it at the AMAs.
However, things swiftly took a turn after accepting that offer. In the documentary, Gomez’s excitement over plans for the song and the Rare album quickly turned to panic as she swiftly exited the roof, complaining of “stress.” Considering she was just coming back to the stage after two years away, that’s an understandable reaction.
The AMA performance of the song went over poorly
This anxiety continued all the way up to the day before the AMAs. Selena Gomez continued to make mistakes during rehearsals, finding herself unable to hit the right notes and even having a full-blown panic attack. While she tried to rally and give her best effort, the infamous history of the show speaks for itself.
It’s undeniable that the performance was an off-key and uncomfortable disaster. In the aftermath, Gomez revealed in the documentary that she locked herself in a dark room to digest everything. Friends came to try and console her as others, including Swift and Halsey, showed her public support. Even so, she had to tell them she didn’t want to talk about work whenever a conversation drifted in that direction. Despite this, she was forced to get back in the saddle almost immediately due to everything scheduled up to that point. “I need a break…. I have a lot of work to do.” It was a rough situation all around, though it’s clear she’s doing much better these days.
