![Cynthia Nixon, Kristin Davis and Sarah Jessica Parker with Chris Noth are seen in wedding attire on the set of 'Sex and the City: The Movie'. The scene played out after Mr. Big abandoned Carrie Bradshaw and their wedding.](https://www.cheatsheet.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/SATC-The-movie-scaled.jpg)
‘Sex and the City’: Who Was More at Fault for Carrie Bradshaw’s Wedding Disaster, Miranda Hobbes or Lily Goldenblatt?
Carrie Bradshaw and John James Preston eventually married, but not without a lot of drama. For six seasons of Sex and the City, Mr. Big played mind games with Carrie, jerking her around whenever he felt like it. In Sex and the City: The Movie, it seemed like they were going to get it right, and then he left Carrie at the altar. Years later, and after the character’s tragic death in episode 1 of And Just Like That…, we can’t help but think back to the famed jilting. Who was at fault for the big mistake? Did Lily Goldenblatt or Miranda Hobbes play a bigger role in Carrie Bradshaw’s wedding humiliation?
Mr. Big left Carrie Bradshaw at the altar
Carrie Bradshaw and Mr. Big’s relationship at the beginning of Sex and the City: The Movie was just a tease, much like their relationship throughout the show’s six seasons. They appeared stable, happy, and in love. Of course, problems had to arise.
![Cynthia Nixon, Kristin Davis and Sarah Jessica Parker with Chris Noth are seen in wedding attire on the set of 'Sex and the City: The Movie'. The scene played out after Mr. Big abandoned Carrie Bradshaw and their wedding.](https://www.cheatsheet.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/SATC-The-movie-scaled.jpg?w=1200&strip=all&quality=89)
The looming threat of a serious commitment sent Mr. Big spiraling. He sat in front of his wedding venue, the New York Public Library, before deciding to take off. Carrie Bradshaw considered herself “jilted” and “left at the altar,” but to be fair, that didn’t exactly happen. Mr. Big was ready to head back, so his freakout was only momentary. While the pair eventually did get married, we still need to place the blame for Mr. Big’s decision to flee his wedding. Was Miranda’s harsh words about marriage the catalyst for his anxiety, or did Lily Goldenblatt momentarily thwart Carrie Bradshaw’s happy ending by hiding her phone?
Did Miranda Hobbes’ statements about marriage lead to the jilting?
Miranda Hobbes may have been happy for Carrie and Mr. Big, but she wasn’t exactly comfortable in her marriage. After a long dry spell, Miranda learned that her husband, Steve Brady, had slept with someone else. Miranda quickly left him and moved into an apartment.
![Cynthia Nixon as Miranda Hobbes in episode 2 of 'And Just Like That...', the 'Sex and the City' reboot](https://www.cheatsheet.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/Miranda-Hobbes.jpg?w=1200&strip=all&quality=89)
Miranda’s logical side ensured the logistics of her move were quick and easy. Still, her emotional side was battered. She was bitter, angry, and hurt by Steve’s actions. So hurt, in fact, that she told Mr. Big that she thought he and Carrie were crazy for getting married. The words seemed to haunt Big and may have led to his cold feet. She was kind of to blame for the jilting.
Could Lily Goldenblatt have prevented Carrie Bradshaw’s wedding disaster by handing over the phone?
Miranda Hobbes wasn’t the only Sex and the City character seemingly conspiring against Mr. Big and Carrie Bradshaw’s love. Lily Goldenblatt, then just a toddler, took Carrie’s phone and hid it in her bedazzled purse. The phone sat in that purse while the entire wedding party headed out to the venue. Lily was in the wedding party.
![Cathy Ang on the set of 'And Just Like That...,' the follow-up series to 'Sex and the City,' in July 2021 in New York City](https://www.cheatsheet.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/08/Cathy-Ang-Sex-and-the-City-Reboot-And-Just-Like-That.jpg?w=1200&strip=all&quality=89)
Her decision to hide the phone certainly played a significant role in the demise of Carrie and Mr. Big’s perfect wedding. When he could not deal with his anxiety, Mr. Big called Carrie repeatedly, hoping she could calm his nerves. When he couldn’t reach her, he opted to leave. One could argue that if Lily hadn’t hidden the phone and Mr. Big had gotten in touch with Carrie, she could have smoothed things over.
So, who was at fault?
Technically, neither Miranda nor Lily caused Mr. Big to leave Carrie Bradshaw moments before their wedding. If we have to assign some blame to the entire disaster, we’d have to say Miranda played a bigger role in Carrie’s mortification than Lily.
![Chris Noth and Sarah Jessica Parker in 'And Just Like That...' Mr. Big first appeared in season 1 of 'Sex and the City'](https://www.cheatsheet.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/Carrie-and-Mr.-Big.jpg?w=1200&strip=all&quality=89)
While Mr. Big was nervous initially, Miranda’s words appeared to make him second-guess his interest in marriage. If in an alternate reality, Miranda didn’t say anything, Mr. Big probably would have gone through with the wedding. Frankly, if Miranda hadn’t said something to freak out Mr. Big, he would have never needed to call Carrie before meeting her at the New York Public Library. Lily’s phone stunt could have been completely inconsequential.